16th May
I am not a raging feminist. I am however still very bitter about a certain shitcock's exit out of my life.
Why is it that the one who promises they would take a bullet for you, ends up being the one pulling the trigger?
Last week we passed in the street. He stopped and said "heeeey you", in a super-gay-over-the-top-cheery-look-I'm-not-really-a-twat kind of voice.... I stop... hold my head high "hey hows thing (don't wait for response) I can't stop, super busy at the moment, really busy, lots of things to do, lots people to see", big smiley face "catch you another time" and walk off. I smile to myself and think wow - I am an independent strong woman who really doesn't give a shit anymore. Oh yeah!!! I can take anything.... ANYTHING!!! Then I am a little bit more honest with myself - oh my fricking hell that was hard, ouch stomach hurts, feels like I have been slapped in the face.... dont cry, dont cry, dont cry.... remember independent strong woman who can do anything, anything, ... anything but snuggle up with him, hold him, talk nonsense to him, anything except everything I want to do with him.
Lonely and sad, holding back the tears I drag myself home. Ok woman, get a hold of yourself. You have a choice here - do you want to be Bridget Jones or Jennifer Aniston (obviously I want to be Jennifer Aniston she is gorgeous, but also bounces back hotter and stronger than ever from her many breakups)? Ok I don't want anymore break ups, I'm not handling this very well, so really I don't want to be Jennifer but you get the gist of it. Remember he is a true arsewipe, a jerk, a wankbollock, he cheated numerous times and failed miserably to make you feel good. YOU DESERVE MORE!
Back to the Pinot Noir - I can always count on wine to make me feel better (if even only for a little while) tonight I have limited myself to just 2 glasses (large of course) and spent the evening drooling at hot bods on pinterest. Tomorrow I will make a plan to get my life back in order.......
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